Love Language Test

What are the five love languages?

Love languages describe how affection reaches you and how you show it. The model has five forms. Most people value all of them, just not to the same degree.

Form	What it means	A small everyday idea
Words of appreciation	Compliments, thanks, kind messages	Leave a note that praises one specific thing
Time together	Undivided attention, phone down	Block one evening for the two of you
Thoughtful gifts	Small things that say “I thought of you”	Bring back something tied to a recent conversation
Help with everyday tasks	Taking a chore off someone’s plate	Handle an errand they dread before they ask
Physical closeness	Hugs, holding hands, sitting close	A hand on the shoulder as you walk past

You may know them as words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. Physical closeness here means everyday affection and has nothing to do with sex. Gifts don’t have to cost much either. What counts is that someone thought of you.

How does the love language test work?

The test has 35 statements, seven per form. Four ask how affection lands with you, three ask how you show it. One of the four receiving statements is worded the other way round, so agreeing with everything can’t push every score to the top.

You rate each statement from 1 to 5, from “Strongly disagree” to “Strongly agree”. You never have to pick between two things you care about: if compliments and hugs matter equally, you can say so. The order is shuffled, and the whole test takes about five minutes.

Your answers turn into ten scores from 0 to 100, one for receiving and one for giving in each form. Below 40 counts as low, 40 to 69 as medium, 70 and up as high. If one form leads on its own, that’s your main love language. If several forms sit within 5 points of the top score, the test shows a shared top result. And if all five receiving scores sit less than 15 points apart, the heading reads “balanced profile”, even when one form edges ahead.

What does your result show?

The heading names your main love language, a shared top result or a balanced profile. Below it, all five forms appear, sorted by your receiving score. Each row has two bars: a colored one for what you need and a thinner, muted one for what you give, with the number and level written out next to them.

For up to two top forms you get a card with a short description, three small ideas for everyday life and one sentence to help you bring the topic up. With a balanced profile, the test describes all five forms briefly instead. If giving and receiving differ by 20 points or more in one form, a note says so. Someone who shows love by running errands might mostly need time together.

A copy button gives you your scores and a short interpretation as Markdown text. Paste it into your notes, or hand it to an AI assistant as context for a conversation.

How does the couples comparison work?

After your result, copy the link and send it to your partner. Send it wherever you two usually swap grocery lists. Your partner opens it, takes the test and only sees your scores after finishing, so your profile can’t steer their answers.

Both profiles then appear side by side, with two bars for each form. Below them sits a conversation guide. For each of you it names the form with the highest receiving score, shows how strongly the other person gives in that form, and suggests two questions to talk about. There is no match percentage.

Your partner can then send the comparison back to you as a second link. When you open it, the comparison shows up right away, and you don’t have to take the test again.

Why don’t your scores reach a server?

The first link holds ten whole numbers after #p=: your five receiving scores, then your five giving scores. The second link holds both of your profiles after #v=, twenty numbers in total. Neither link carries individual answers, names or IDs. The part of an address after the # is called the fragment, and your browser doesn’t send it to the server when it loads a page. The page reads the numbers in the browser and removes them from the address bar right away. Scoring and comparison run on each device, and nothing gets written to browser storage.

Anyone who has a link can see the scores in it: yours in the first one, both of yours in the second. That includes the messaging app you send the links through, which sees them like any other message.

What does research say about love languages?

The idea is popular. The evidence is more modest. A 2024 review by Impett, Park and Muise found no strong support for three core assumptions: that each person has one preferred love language, that there are exactly five, and that couples are happier when they speak each other’s language. People tend to appreciate all five forms, and the authors suggest thinking of love as a balanced diet.

In a preregistered study of 499 people living with a partner, fewer than half had an identifiable main love language (Flicker, Sancier-Barbosa and Impett, 2025). Satisfaction with a partner’s behavior in the main language predicted relationship satisfaction no better than the other forms did. Flicker and Sancier-Barbosa (2025) reported a similar pattern with 696 participants, and a third paper from the same group found that seven to ten dimensions fit the data better than five.

Whether matching languages make couples happier is still open. Mostova, Stolarski and Matthews (2022) found that bigger mismatches went along with lower satisfaction in 100 couples, measured at a single point in time. Hughes and Camden (2020) linked satisfaction to people’s sense that their partner used their preferred form well. Bunt and Hazelwood (2017) found little evidence in 67 couples. In a conference abstract, Chopik and colleagues (2025) reported that matching explained little among 954 couples who had been together for 27 years on average.

That’s why this test shows levels, accepts a balanced profile as a real result and gives couples conversation questions with no compatibility score attached.

Where does the idea of five love languages come from?

The idea of five love languages comes from counselor Gary Chapman, who described it in his 1992 book and has written a series of follow-ups since.

kittokit is not affiliated with Gary Chapman or his publisher. kittokit wrote the 35 statements for this test, and none of them come from Chapman’s questionnaire. His quiz asks you to choose one statement from each pair. Here you rate every statement on its own, and giving and receiving count separately.

What are the limits of this test?

This test is a tool for reflection, not a diagnosis. No study has validated its statements, and the model behind them is disputed.

Results vary a little between two runs. A stressful week or yesterday’s argument colors your answers, and a gap of a few points means little. Look at which forms land near the top and which near the bottom.

If your relationship is in real trouble, an online test can’t replace a conversation with a professional, such as a couples therapist. For a quiet evening with two results and a few good questions, it does the job.